240413 Ended work early yesterday.. The first day officially I would call it for the start of my rsaf career.. First shift work.. First day.. Brand new beginning.. Well.. Yesterday was the day I suddenly felt like throwing a lot of thoughts into my brain as well just to do some thinking.. What's new right.. All I could get into my brain was people who I could relate to and people who no matter how tough the situation was could just be that medicine to cure all the unhappiness and anger away.. One of them is definitely without a doubt my dumbdumb bestbest friend.. Forever busy like always. But never blamed her as she is just too friendly.. Always there to do those little thoughtful and funny things which can really do a lot in brightening up my day.. Yup she may be damn picky on certain stuff.. Always telling me off but thats with no ill thoughts at all.. At least that is what I feel.. Gosh!! Now with her attached.. Guess she would be even busier wouldnt it.. But I believed that she can be counted upon when the time I need someone.. Another person which I think would happen to be the main reason this is written would be you.. It really does feels like it was only recently that it happened.. But the fact that it happened more then four years ago feels really different now.. Despite it not working out between the both of us.. Really had no idea why I held on for so long after.. The time spent waiting for a chance to happen or come didnt materialise in the end.. Left there hanging by a thread which finally snapped not too long ago.. No one blames you because you wouldnt have known.. But those were the times when a simple nothing would have carried so much.. Despite all that has happened.. It doesnt changes the fact that I still care about you no less.. Maybe just without the feeling ba.. The fact that I am still thinking about where do I go from here is something I can occupy my brain with.. We all changed as we move through different stages of our lives.. Maybe like what they say.. I really do feel as though there are lesser and lesser people whose ear can be loan to me.. Gutting everything inside sucks!! Seriously!! But what can I do..

6:50 PM;
won't be left ALONE